Let’s face it — life has become expensive. But not just “buying-new-shoes” expensive. We’re talking unga expensive. And if you’ve ever had an ex with a taste for soft life and vibe checks, you know that’s saying a lot.
But how did we get here? How did the humble packet of maize flour — once the budget-friendly MVP of every Kenyan household — suddenly start acting like it's imported from Milan? Welcome to the inflation chronicles, where everything is up… except your salary.
Wait… What Even Is Inflation?
In simple terms, inflation is when your money starts misbehaving. Like, one day Ksh 100 buys you a 2kg packet of unga, and the next, it barely covers airtime and a chewing gum.
It’s like dating someone who keeps changing the terms of the relationship — one day they're sweet, the next day they're “finding themselves,” and you’re left wondering if you should've just stayed single. That’s what inflation does to your wallet.
So Why Is Unga Doing the Most Right Now?
1. High Production Costs
Between droughts, expensive fertilizers, fuel prices, and logistical chaos, farming ain’t cheap anymore. And since most of our maize is locally grown, guess who absorbs the price hike? That’s right — you. The consumer. The same you who’s already budgeting airtime by the minute.
2. Imported Drama
When we don’t produce enough locally, we import maize. But then comes the global supply chain saga: war in Ukraine, dollar shortages, shipping fees, import duties — all acting like clingy exes that won’t let you breathe.
3. The Shilling Took a Beating
Our currency has been losing weight faster than a heartbroken gym rat. When the shilling weakens against the dollar, everything we import becomes more expensive — and guess who’s always invited to that party? Unga.
Meanwhile, Your Salary Is Still in 2020
Prices are on vibes and chaos, but your income? Stuck in lockdown mode. It’s giving “I’m not ready for a relationship” energy. The cost of living keeps rising while your paycheck ghosts you like a situationship gone wrong.
That means you’re spending more to get less — whether it’s groceries, transport, or fuel. It's not just unga; it's sugar, milk, oil, rent… life itself. And all you wanted was a simple life, two meals a day, and someone to text you back.
The Ex Comparison: Let’s Break It Down
| Item | Ex’s Demands | Unga |
|---|---|---|
| Emotionally draining? | ✅ | ✅ |
| Expensive over time? | ✅ | ✅ |
| Disappears without notice? | ✅ | ✅ (check the shelves) |
| Returns after 3 weeks like nothing happened? | ✅ | ✅ (hello restocks) |
| Leaves you hungry? | ✅ | ✅ |
See? Unga is out here giving ex-energy, but without the sweet texts and fake apologies. At least your ex said “good morning” before asking for 5K. Unga just sits there in the supermarket, looking at you like, “Si you’re broke?”
So What Can You Do About It?
Besides scream into a pillow?
- Budget ruthlessly – Know where every shilling is going. The days of spontaneous Uber Eats are over.
- Buy in bulk when you can – Even if it means teaming up with friends or fam.
- Diversify your hustle – Inflation doesn’t care that you’re tired. Get that side gig, sell those thrifted clothes, do that consultancy.
- Speak up – Vote wisely, hold leaders accountable, and support policies that protect consumers.
In Conclusion:
Inflation isn’t just an economic term. It’s a full-blown toxic relationship with your wallet. It’s making unga act like it’s above you, and your ex? Suddenly looks a bit affordable in comparison (but don’t go back — your ancestors are watching).
So next time you're in the supermarket, staring at that overpriced unga like it's whispering "usikose kunikumbuka", just know — it's not you. It's the economy.
No comments:
Post a Comment